Kenshin's fight for Sanity
by SouloftheSword
Summary: What happens to Kenshin, after the Shogunate has taken away all the sake in Japan, Like I don't know, how bout becoming the battousai again.


Kenshin's fight for Sanity  
By: Kenshin  
  
(A the Shogunate's palace)  
  
Shogunate: Soldier, get over here.  
  
Soldier: Hai. (runs over) (bows) Yes my lord.  
  
Shogunate: What's the current whereabouts of the rebel, Kenshin  
  
Soldier: The battousai, my lord?  
  
Shogunate: (throws empty sake container at him) Of course him, what other Kenshin do you that was once called battousai?  
  
Soldier: ummmmmmmmmmmm……I do……wait, nevermind.  
  
Shogunate: baka.  
  
Soldier: Sorry my lord, Kenshin hasn't been seen by our forces for a while.  
  
Shogunate: kuso………I was gonna send 1,000 shin-sen gumi after him.  
  
Soldier: Sir, forgive me for saying this, but he could probably kill them all with a tsubuku knife.  
  
Shogunate: (smacks him) Well you are right, but I'm not sure he could kill them all with just a tsubuku.  
  
Soldier: Don't you remember when you had him in that trap, and he was acting like he had way too much.  
  
Shougnate: Oh yeah………that was truly pitiful.  
  
Soldier: Maybe you could find a way for him to join you.  
  
Shougnate: How?  
  
Soldier: Simple take away all the nation's sake.  
  
Shogunate: Yes, then I can bribe him with sake, to work as my phantom (insert maniacal laughter here)  
  
Soldier: So, should I make sake illegal or something.  
  
Shogunate: Just do whatever, but make sure I became the owner of all the nation's sake.  
  
Soldier: hai.  
  
(Insert more maniacal laughter here)  
  
One week later………….  
  
(in some small town)  
  
Kenshin: (walks into a bar) 10 bottles of sake, please.  
  
Bartender: Didn't you hear, the shogunate has made the consumption of sake illegal.  
  
Kenshin: (pulls out his sword) Nani?!!??!?!?!?!? Give me some damn sake, before I become the battousai.  
  
Enshi: (walks in) hi Kenshin.  
  
Kenshin: (turns around, and slices poor Enshi in half) (insert blue aura thingy here).  
  
Enshi: (regenerates himself) Well, nice to see you too (pulls out sword)  
  
Kenshin: (slices him in half again) Can't you see I'm going through a crisis. (realizes he just killed Enshi again) Oh well.  
  
Bartender: Okay (really scared) don't worry I sell you some bootleg sake.  
  
Kenshin: (sheathes his sword and smiles) hai.  
  
Bartender: But it will cost you.  
  
Kenshin: Money is no object when it comes to sake.  
  
Bartender: Okay, that'll be 9999999¥  
  
Kenshin: (pays him) This better be good sake (unsheathes sword, slices the table in half *click* the table is no more)  
  
Bartender: (hands him back his moneyand runs away).  
  
Kenshin: Oh well (walks out of the bar and sees Enshi alive) I thought I killed you (thinks) twice.  
  
Enshi: You did, but I'm not the normal Enshi, well sorta, I'm immortal Enshi.  
  
Kenshin: Nani?!??!?!?!?!?  
  
Enshi: That's right, you will never defeat me Kenshin, it's pay back for what you did to Tomoe, so now you will die (laughs maniaclly).  
  
Kenshin: (not even paying attention, ends up finishing all his sake) What did you say Enshi?  
  
Enshi: (falls over anime-style)   
  
Kenshin: Well now I'm gonna try to find some more sake. Sayonora Enshi. (walks away)  
  
Enshi: (screams) Kenshin, get back here so I can kill you.  
  
Kenshin: (totally oblivious)  
  
Enshi: Kuso, now I'll have to wait to complete my revenge.  
  
(Scene shifts to Kaoru's fencing school)  
  
Kaoru: You must learn how to control your weapon with grace, or I will no longer teach you.  
  
Student: Hai.  
  
Kaoru: (wonders when Kenshin will return)  
Student: (taps her on the shoulder)  
  
Kaoru: (still thinking of Kenshin, then remembers her student) Yes. What's wrong.  
  
Student: (points to door) Sano wants to talk to you.  
  
Kaoru: (looks towards the door) Oh, okay. Continue your training I'll be right back. (walks towards the door)  
  
Sano: Konnichiwa (bows)  
  
Kaoru: Konnichiwa (bows)  
  
Sano: Kaoru, I was wondering if you know where Kenshin is, because there's a group of shin-sen gumi after him.  
  
Kaoru: He was going to get some sake.  
  
Sano: But, I thought the Shogunate just made sake illegal.  
  
Kaoru: Nani?!?!?!?!?  
  
Student: Nani?!?!?! Sake illegal. Damn shogunate, he shall feel my blade.  
  
Kaoru: You aren't even close to being skilled enough to even last against the shin-sen gumi, let alone the shogunate.  
  
Student: Yes I am. Watch. (unsheathes sword, tries to do aura thingy, but instead spins out of control and crashes into the door)  
  
Kaoru and Sano: (laugh)   
  
Sano: Let me show you a real attack.  
  
Kaoru: No Sano, you'll destroy my school.  
  
Sano: No I won't  
  
Kaoru: Yes you will.  
  
Sano: (prepares to do burning fists attack, but stops) Fine.  
  
Student: (still lying on the floor)   
  
Kaoru: So the shin-sen gumi are after Kenshin  
  
Sano: (nods) I don't know why, though.  
  
Kaoru: Well it's not like they can defeat him, so why do they bother.  
  
Sano: Most of them know they can't defeat him, but they still have honor to uphold.  
  
Kaoru: Yeah Kenshin could probably kill all of the shogunates forces with………..a tsubuku knife.  
  
· I think you can see a pattern with the tsubuku knife by now.  
  
Sano: Probably.  
  
Kaoru: Maybe you should go find him, just in case he gets ambushed.  
  
Sano: Hai. (leaves to go find Kenshin)  
  
Kaoru: (turns to her student) Well you aren't gonna learn how to use that thing by lying on the floor.  
  
Student: (unconscious)   
  
Kaoru: (falls over anime-style) I can't believe this.  
  
(We find Kenshin walking down a road, kinda drunk, but still looking for more sake)  
  
Kenshin: (singing) 200 bottles of sake on the wall, 200 bottles of sake, take one down pass it around, 199 bottles of sake on the wall…………..  
  
· I couldn't think of anything better  
  
The Shin-sen gumi see a lone men approach, who appears to be tipsy, swaying back and forth as he walks. "Hold your positions," whispers the captain, "wait till he passes you, then we will attack." All of the soldiers reply, "hai." All of the shin-sen gumi grab the hilt of their blades as their tipsy foe nears.  
  
Kenshin continues walking, he looks to his right and sees a house. He thinks to himself, "they must have some sake," so he unsheathes his sword, and walks into the house.  
  
One of the shin-sen gumi see him walk into the house, he whispers, "Nani, what's he doing." The captain slowly creeps over and looks. He can no longer see their tipsy red-headed foe. "Kuso, I guess we'll have to seige the house, says the captain. All of the soldiers nod and follow the captain as he leads them towards the house.  
  
Kenshin looks around the house and finds no one, but he does find some sake. He picks it up, "they won't miss it," he says to the wall. He then stands there for awhile, waiting for the wall to reply, but then realizes it's inanimate. As he walks towards the door a strange feeling comes over him, he suddenly senses an evil presence nearing. With sword still in hand he moves cautiously towards the door, waiting for the attack to begin. He hears footsteps coming closer, then they suddenly stop.  
  
"Okay, surround the house," yells the captain, "I'd like to see him get out of this." "Sir, but he is the battousai, this won't be so easy, " says one of the newer recruits. The Captain grabs him by the neck and puts his sword within inches of his face,"Did I ask your opinion. No I don't think so. If you want to live, then don't question my authority," he throws the young boy to ground. The soldier lets out a bearly audible "hai." Then like lighting a figure flys out of the house as if he where an oni. "Get him," screams the captain, "don't let him escape." The young soldier lies on ground, unmoving, eyes wide open as if he had seen a ghost. He watches as his comrades are sliced in half by the battousai.   
  
A soldier charges at Kenshin, from behind while, he blocks some slashes. Kenshin gets his blade past his opponet's blade, and buries his Katana deep into his torso. The foe streches his hand out, then falls into his own pool of blood. Kenshin then feels a change in the air and realizes another fool wants to die.  
  
He slashes at Kenshin, but he suddenly disappears. The soldier stands in his place in pure amazement wondering where his foe went. He suddenly hears a voice screaming, "I'm up here," The soldier looks up and sees the battousai with sword above head ready to finish him off. He puts up his sword to block it.  
  
Kenshin sees the sword and starts laughing. He brings his blade down as he come closer to the ground, and breaks through his foe's blade as well as his shaking body. Kenshin lands safely he slowly sheathes his sword, then click, the shin-sen gumi falls to the ground with a three foot long cut. He now lies lifeless in a pool of his own fluids.   
  
The startled soldier looks on as his comrade was slashed in half. He continues to lie on the ground unable to move and unable to speak. He is too scared, for fear he will join his comrades. All he can do is stare at the battousai.   
  
  
To be continued…………..  
  



End file.
